When it comes to relationships, our ego tries to hustle us into believing the myth that there is a scarcity of finding true love, when, in fact, there are plenty of available people out there in the world. You are probably thinking “Erroneous! Maybe there are plenty of tools on Tinder.com –this girl’s smoking crack!”
I completely relate to how you might be feeling. I mean, sometimes I feel like we’re playing a game of musical chairs, and I’m going to be the only one who’s left standing when the music stops. Alone – all by myself. But that isn’t the way it works. It’s not like we’re chasing some elusive endangered species. People are abundant. Love is abundant. Relationships are abundant. There is no man/woman shortage, and the right person is out there looking for you, if you are out there looking for them.
Your deepest fears will tend to surface when you are under pressure. Your ego-based fears and shadows might reveal themselves as a sense of desperation, insecurity, inadequacy, scarcity or a feeling of being disconnected, unwanted, or unloved.
When you love yourself wholly, and continually grow and take positive steps in your life, you are building a solid and healthy foundation to your self-worth. Conversely, if you are only building your foundation with ego-based bricks (like enhancing your physical beauty, making more money, or accumulating more stuff), you may get into a relationship with someone, but it may not be a healthy and lasting connection. You may simply meet that person mask-to-mask, rather than heart-to-heart.
If your core beliefs are based on scarcity, fear, and ego-based superficial attributes and qualities, then you will build your foundation with bricks that are made of scarcity, fear, desperation and insecurity. Such a foundation will be weak, fragile, and structurally unsound, because it is built with all of those ego-based bricks. You will attract a partner at that same vibration level.
Conversely, when you build your foundation with bricks made of your quintessential self-worth attributes (the qualities that really speak to your heart and soul), you will meet the right person heart-to-heart and connect soul-to-soul. You will value yourself first, so that you can truly value that person. You will love all of yourself in order to accept and unconditionally love them. You will come from a place of security and abundance, trusting the Universe to gift you this person when you are ready to receive them. This is your journey living in love, security, and abundance rather than fear, anxiety, and scarcity.
Weekly Task: With open awareness, notice what you value and where you are placing your focus. Are these in line with your soul’s values and true nature? Are you coming from a place of desperation, fear, and lack or a place of security, love, and abundance?
* This blog contains pieces from Audrey Sutton’s book The Blissful Bitch due in 2014 *